Queen Elsa was right: Let It Go!

Having been retired for 28 months now, it's probably time for me to stop talking about it! But you can probably tell, from all my talking about it, that it's been a challenge. I absolutely loved what I did as a teacher and elementary media specialist. It was fun and different every day. Where else can you dress in silly hats on your morning tv broadcast, make slime with first graders, have engaging lunch bunch discussions with older students, improve tech skills beyond what you thought possible, and more! Plus work with dedicated adults with the same mission to improve the lives of the youth of our country. Makes me tired just thinking about it!

So it wasn't the busyness that I missed, or even the fun. I think it's just the purpose and meaning that it gave my life. Maybe even my identity. Teaching can be a hard profession to leave. Yet leave I did. And I've prayed every day since then for the Lord to show me what's next. However, I think I was still holding onto my identity of the past. Once a teacher, always a teacher! How was the Lord going to show me new roads if I was still steering my car in the old direction? I needed to surrender the past and the fear of letting go. What might the future hold if I wasn't a teacher or the Library Lady any more?  Jesus take the wheel! 

The following is a quote that has had great impact on me in this transition time: 

Especially the second line: there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. My teaching and library work, while loaded with fond memories, really was no longer meaningful. Note I didn't say important, or impactful. It was and is! But it's in the past. It is not where my security should be. It is not the movement and change that I knew the Lord had in mind for me. Look up and forward! There's the life and security I was longing for. How could I know what the Lord would show me if I was always looking behind? Yes, we teachers don't lose the "eyes in the back of our heads" when we retire, but the Lord said to keep those eyes closed! Look ahead. Let go of the wheel to see where He wants to steer me! Freedom!

As I've been able to do that, new groups of friends have come into my life, new activities, and areas to grow spiritually and share that growth. That's where the focus is now! Life has truly become a new exciting adventure. There is new life in the movement. New strength in the change. In the days to come I plan to expand on the changes to encourage you to break out/move on/steer into the new course for your life. Have you sensed the same thing? Ready for a new season and adventure? Let's do this together! (I can almost hear Tom Brady yelling his famous "Let's Go!" at this point!).

I look forward to sharing more along this exciting adventure of faith. I read a quote about the Lord being our great Travel Agent and we're the tourists he is looking out for. He's identified our routes, bookings and destinations. Let's trust Him and enjoy the journey...and stay grounded, friends!

 Happy New Year!

It's almost 2 weeks in, but we can still say it, right? It's still a time of reflection and making resolutions. Or changing the ones you made January 1 to be more realistic! Kind of like the new Weight Watchers ads where the people are in in line returning their overly-hopeful goals that were set. Swapping them for something more realistic. (oh, like maybe losing 1-2 pounds a week instead of 10 by the weekend?) BTW, I'm a Lifetime WW member, but am not preaching it on this post!

So as we reflect on what we'd like to achieve in the new year, we usually look at the past. Sometimes the past week/month/year/life seems like such a mess, we're rather overwhelmed by what we can change or want to accomplish. I wrote the same general goals every year and usually quit by February, so for a couple years I've saved the time and paper and just put 1. Live as well as I can, with as much joy as I can, with Jesus. That covers it! And it's enough.

Do you ever just feel like you're in line for soup at the Soup Nazi's (Seinfeld fans know this, you can also check it online) take-out and not sure what you want in life, or what you want to change/do/feel? Your anxiety level increases as the line moves and you near the Soup Nazi, hoping you order correctly or you'll blow your order and miss out on the soup. How about instead, you become the Soup Nazi, and everyone in line is one of the problems you're facing. You address each one confidently, either serving (accepting) it or shouting "Next!" to the ones you want to go away. Those messes are simply shooed out the door, never to be served again. You're ready for something better to come along. Become the happy person who looks at your failures and disappointments face to face and declare "Next" to them, as you dismiss them to not hound you anymore.

As we look at the New Year, we can't move forward if we can't let go of the past. We won't recognize the new if we're living and dwelling on the old. Quit processing ancient history so that you can press on to living now. This isn't to say that you'll forget the past entirely. Just what is so painful that it is holding you back. Quite often I've found that it's something or someone I need to forgive. To move beyond that wrong so I can face the future with a new hope. When you forgive, you let go of the hope of a better past. It's over...quit letting it spoil today and the days ahead. As is written in the book of Joel 2:25, the Lord will give much joy to more than make up for "the years the locusts have eaten".

Have you had a few locusts in your life? Maybe a whole swarm or plague? Then it's time to turn it over to the Lord. You can be whole and new right now. Reclaim what the past has "eaten". Say "Next" to the sin oppressing you as you send it packing out the door. Surrendering to Jesus is the best "resolution" you can ever make. He's here to give you a new locust-free life! Choose to follow Him as you enter 2023.

Your New Year can start today, friends! Start today to be grounded in Him! And Happy New Year!

The Legend of the Empty Coffee Cup or Who Made This Mess?

Being a retired librarian, I fondly remember numerous stories, tales, legends and fables. At this time of year, going into a new year, a favorite comes to mind. So pour yourself a cup of something warm and yummy and enjoy this tale, "The Legend of the Empty Coffee Cup or Who Made this Mess?".

Once upon a time, a spry retired librarian, who we'll call Sandy, rose for her early quiet time and coffee to start the day. As she had done for hundreds of previous mornings, she turned on the Keurig, removed the used pod, popped in a new one (Hmmm, she thought, Santa's White Christmas sounds good today) and pressed the start button. She then turned to put a few dishes away, check her phone which was charging on the counter, and waited for the sound of the end of the brew. Just before hearing the beep, her adoring and ever-observant husband, who we'll call John, entered the kitchen and said, "Who made this mess?" Since there were only 2 people in the house, the question was moot. She turned and was surprised to see the coffee, not steaming from a cup but spreading all over the counter and down the front of the kitchen cabinet! "What the heck, she uttered mildly, I just wasted an expensive SWC pod on this! And what a hot mess (literally!) to clean up!" Being the efficient homemaker that she was, plus possessing an innate ability to find the good in things, she wiped up the coffee, brewed a new cup, and thought "there's a story in this"!

And so there is! Going into a new year, we often want to know what's in store for us. More than that, we want to know what God has in mind for us, especially since the previous year featured some real "interesting challenges". More than ever, considering the past year, I'm looking for more joy. I'm re-reading an incredible 90 day devotional by Mike Mason titled "Champagne for the Soul". A good friend recommended it when I was going through breast cancer in 2005 and it has never failed to bring me out of whatever funk I might be wallowing or just tip-toeing through. But God can't pour His joy and blessings into a cup that's already full, or one that has day-old coffee, or grounds settling on the bottom. He wants to fill us with his unfathomable blessings on a daily basis. This can't happen if we don't offer Him our empty cup. A season of limitless possibility lies ahead of us. A clean freshness. Do you want stale coffee or a fresh, hotly brewed cup...all the way to the brim? You know, "the best part of waking up" and living your life "good to the last drop". (You didn't know those coffee slogans could be so spiritual, did you?).

This New Year, let's follow Paul's admonition to the Phillipians to "forget what lies behind and strain towards what is ahead, press on toward the goal to win the prize." The Lord wants to do a new thing for and in you, so you need to let go of the past for a better future. Empty your cup so He can fill it. Toss off the past pain, regrets, failures, unforgiveness, troubles and the energy spent on trying to re-live it and as the Soup Nazi said in Seinfeld "Next!" 

I'm looking forward to having more of the joy of the Lord this year, friends. As Mike Mason writes in one of his "sips of champagne", "Joy...lies right under our noses, often in the most ordinary experiences. If we spent the next year simply enjoying who we are and what we have, we'd be much further ahead than by striving for more. What we need most ...is a quiet realization of what already is." Join me in the adventure. Stay grounded in the Lord, offer Him your empty cup and see what happens! I know it will be an exciting ride!

Moving Mom

 Well, friends, I've been retired for approximately 9 months, so it's time to "birth" something new! At least in my writing. I've enjoyed the rest from leaving 43 years of teaching behind, but now I'm enjoying opening new doors to see what's in store for my next chapter (sorry, as a retired librarian, I'm required by law to include that expression!). I feel like I'm playing "Let's Make a Deal" and see the doors and curtains, but am not sure they're all for me. Happily, though, God doesn't play the same game and I don't think He'd let me get the year's supply of olives! 

However, this is not about my life changes, but about a transition of another kind. This week we moved my 94 year old mother into an assisted living facility. I know my sisters are saying "We? Really Sandy? You were in Florida and we're in Ohio doing the hard labor and  tending to all the details that such a move involves". Ok, my wonderful, hard-working and dedicated sisters did the work! I maintained contact by text, phone calls, and prayers...with our brother also in the loop, but I wasn't able to get in on the adventure due to being needed at home with my husband. I'm sure there were several eye-rolls at my suggestions on what they needed or what chair should go where in a 400 square foot room, until I just let it go, knowing they had it handled. And thankfully, she was all settled into the cozy country facility in one day, happy as a clam. The move wasn't an overnight decision, but after almost monthly incidents in the past year,  she agreed with my siblings that it was all for the best. 

I know the smooth transition isn't always the way, as I learn from discussing it with my friends who have almost all had to deal with the same role-reversal as they age. But I'm thankful for the Lord's direction and confirmation about each step that we took. We'd thought about and discussed it for so long that it was a natural step we all were prepared for. Physically at least!

What I wasn't prepared for was the emotional toll it would take. As I reassured my mom in the days leading to the move, I encouraged her of how good it would be for her, peace of mind for us, security, etc. But there were many moments that I, over 1000 miles away, was the one that needed reassurance! Her move meant that I didn't have a "home" to come back to when I came for my semi-yearly visits. I wouldn't be waking up to share coffee in the kitchen with her and whoever else was staying there at the same time. My dad and a younger brother had passed away 7 years ago, but there were still enough reminders in the house that it was a visit with them, too. But that's gone now. She may have moved only 32 miles (several villages and one county) from her current home, but it seems like a million to me. Also, while she's still quite healthy and spunky, it's a step from independence that tells me she's really getting older! (yeah, Sandy, she's 94...when did you figure that out?) I guess that means I'm getting older, too, but that's another column! The Lord has blessed her with a wonderful life, and it's just continuing at another address. 

I'll be going to Ohio to visit her in October for her birthday celebration. There will be  my sisters and brother, several nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews, which of course are her numerous grandchildren and great-grandchildren and some great-greats! We'll have a family potluck in my niece's converted garage and enjoy honoring my mom. Then return her to her new cozy country home, while we all return to ours. It'll be strange to not get in our jammies and watch TCM late into the night with her, but I'll manage it, knowing that she's in a safe and secure setting. That capable and caring medical staff are just a button away. And that has to be enough.

So I pray that whatever transition you or your loved ones find themselves in at this time, that they find the way paved with secure steps, holding onto the Lord's hand to steady the way. It's the only way truly be grounded, my friends!

I'm Retired...Now What?

 One month ago I retired from 43 years of teaching. That 43 years encompassed  2 states, 4 cities, 9 schools, 15 principals and all school grades. The first 22 years were as a teacher of students with Specific Learning Disabilities/Behavior Disorders and the last 21 were as an elementary Media Specialist. The variety of settings, students and co-workers made for a wonderful life! When my friends would ask what I was going to do when I retired, I'd say sleep, rest, garden, etc. I know they wanted to hear something exciting and worthy of their envy, but hey...43 years...can I do nothing for awhile? And sadly, with the present Covid State of Affairs, that is among the top choices...nothing!

I did venture out of my cocoon to spend 10 days in Ohio to see my 93 year old mom, who had some health issues, but other than that have stayed close to home with my husband. I've kind of been in a holding pattern: holding the remote, my coffee mug, the rake, kitchen spatula, etc. You get the picture. And I love being home and being a homemaker. But after 43 years of the daily stimulation of students, teachers, administrators, books, computers, troubleshooting, etc. I have to admit that I have a hard time with occasionally doing nothing! Please, don't throw anything at me! It's getting better, but it's not for lack of things I could do. It might just be an aimlessness of not knowing where to start. 

So when I started my quiet time this morning, I opened to Jeremiah 33:3 "Call to Me and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know." I laughed. Where else would I get the peace/direction/answers I was seeking, but the Word? Who else to give me the assurance that doing nothing is okay but the Lord? I think He calls it Rest! I can list several things I'd love to pursue and enjoy, but what's His best for me now? Where will I be productive and of service? I think that's the thing I miss as a teacher: feeling useful and of service to others. If  you ask my husband, he'd have an answer: how about him and the home! Can I start to make cookies for him...not a school function? (He gets plenty, I assure you!) I'm sure my teacher friends can relate. But back to the Lord, I need to learn to wait and patiently hear what He has for me in this time and for the future. This is one of those Queen Esther/such a time as this things.  Is it time to my writing? Practice the piano? Get back to gardening? Exercising? Cleaning (ouch)? Purging closets and school stuff ala Maria Kondo (double ouch)? Well, probably yes to all of the above. Volunteering anyplace, which I'm hoping to do, will have to wait until Covid restrictions are over. But obviously there's plenty to keep my busy...or not.

So in returning to writing, which I do feel led to do, do I change the name of my blog to The Grounded Retired Librarian? The Retired Grounded Librarian? Because as we know, once a librarian, always a librarian! Alphabetizing my spice shelves will continue, no matter what! I still refer to emptying the dishwasher as "shelving the plates". Leaving any kind of job can be like having a rubber band snap back into place. I felt large, useful,  and stretched to the limit most of the time at work, and now that I'm home I've shrunk back to "normal", waiting to be used again. But I think it's okay if I stay in the shrunken state for the time being, especially now at the holidays. There's plenty of stretching in the days ahead...we all need to enjoy the times of rest and peace given to us. Remember that in times of waiting there is great reward.

Well, I've hit my 4 paragraph limit, so I'll be signing off for now, friends. I think I'll take a nap! Remember to Stay Restfully and Peacefully Grounded!

Someday is Here!

 Five years ago I wrote a post entitled "I'm Retiring...Someday". It related my feelings surrounding entering our deferred retirement program (DROP) and the range of emotions surrounding that event. What it all boiled down to was that the retirement attitude I had of not letting work issues get me down, making more time for family, taking better care of myself, etc. didn't have to wait for five years when I retired. I could carry that relaxed attitude into every situation, retired or not.

Well, fast forward 5 years and retirement is so close I can smell it. It smells like Pumpkin Spice. Who knew! In 5 weeks I'll be leaving a career of 43 years in Education. It's been like "A Tale of Two Cities"...you know, "best of times and worst of times"! But the Two Cities for me have been like 2 different careers: one of  23 years teaching students in grades 1-12 who had Specific Learning Disabilities and Emotional Disorders and one of being a school Media Specialist for grades pre-k-5 for 20 years. And both have been exciting, challenging, rewarding and totally fulfilling.

So I'm cleaning and sorting the 18 years of stuff that I've accumulated at my current school. I'm living proof of the scientific fact that stuff expands to the space it is allowed to have. I'm blessed with lots of storage and shelves, which means stuff galore. So the great giveaway has begun: swag from numerous conferences, old  Book Fair goodies, superhero themed items (remember that craze?), ditto for pirate, circus, and other themes that won't be revisited by my successor. My teachers and students are loving it! One of our teachers asked what I was going to do with the Lone Ranger lunchbox that has held a spot on one of the bookshelves (not vintage or valuable). I said I think I'm giving it to him! He loved it. And I'll be doing major book giveaways for the students each week. When we had to leave early in the Spring due to Covid, I was left with boxes of new and gently used donated books and bags that were supposed to go home with the students for summer. So out they go now! It's always the right time for getting books into kids' hands.

But what's not so easy to give away are my emotions related to the "stuff" I never got around to. Folders of book  ideas. Tubs of incentives for programs I never could get to. Book sets for book clubs that never happened. You get the idea. As Media Specialists, not only do we wear the "Too Many Books, Not Enough Time" t-shirts, but also the "Too Many Great Ideas, Not Enough Time". And with 5 weeks to go, they obviously won't get done. My successor has her own new, fresh ideas,  yet wants my guidance for continuing what's worked for our students. Yet in these Covid-influenced times, certain programs (Pumpkin Patch, Gingerbread House Village) just won't be happening. 

So do I wallow through these remaining weeks dwelling on what never was or will be? NO WAY! It's time to reflect on what DID happen, not what DIDN'T. Remember the successes with students, not the things I didn't get to do with them. Enjoy memories with teachers who loved the Media Center as much as I did and consistently supported our programs, and not think about the high-maintenance personnel who almost sucked the joy out of each day. And this doesn't have to be a retirement-related thing, friends! Every day we can make the decision to focus on what we ARE doing and not what we AREN'T. Look at the people whose lives we are touching/changing/blessing and not consider what things on our ever-growing To-Do lists didn't get marked off in a day. 

In our profession, and especially in our district, they are so many rock star Media Specialists that it's hard to not compare where we are in the school year to their accomplishments. They regularly post their classes taught, books circulated, tech accomplishments, etc. while many of us are knee-deep in equipment and updating and counting laptops from the spring and summer E-Learning, just trying to catch up. Forget any student interaction yet! But guess what, friends, you are fine! You'll be fine! As Kenny Chesney sings, "Everything's gonna be all right". Take a breath, do what you can, serve the needs of your particular school/population and make sure it's what your Administration wants. Have a conversation with them about the challenges you are facing. What are their expectations? Chances are, they aren't nearly as concerned as you are about all of the other stuff. We put such high demands  on ourselves, and those expectations often aren't what our administrators want or expect. If they're ok with you getting that hard stuff done and not seeing students yet, then you have to be okay with it. If they aren't expecting Twitter-iffic posts, then why are you? If you're getting your program and the school in compliance with tech and equipment reporting, then you're on track. It's just the way it is for now! The fun stuff will come...doesn't it always? Yes! Hang in there!

So is this my final post as an active Media Specialist? NO WAY! I've been a bit lax in my writing, but intend to return as fierce as ever. It's not due to lack of things to say...I always have something I want to put on paper and share. But just catching up here on my blog has restored my writing mojo! Hey, that's another thing I don't need to be retired for! I'm starting my "Farewell Tour" here...but will continue to be the Grounded Librarian. So as I like to encourage you, be expectant and hopeful and Stay Grounded, Friends!

Not More or Less, Just Different!

At this point in the year, 3 weeks into instruction here in Tampa, FL, we Media Specialists can be divided into 2 camps: those who like Neil Diamond and those who don't. No, wait, that's something else. How about: those who have had their Media Orientations and are checking out books and those who haven't had their Orientations and aren't checking out books. Whatever camp you're in, congratulations! That's called doing your job! But how can they both be our job it they're so different? Because we Media Specialists are like fingerprints, no 2 are alike! ( I was going to say snowflakes, but that's not such a complimentary designation these days). So if you're in one of those situations ( I can't think of any others for us MS now), read on!

At the end of the first week, a friend posted that she'd had almost her entire school (which is very large, by the way) in for their initial lessons and were checking out books! Curse you Twitter! What was I doing? Helping with lunch duty, making signage for our custodian, laminating for the office, trying to decide if I'd do a different Orientation this year, sorting out laptops, troubleshooting tech, filling the copy machine, starting my yearly property control report, etc. I'm sure my friend was also doing some of those things, too. But I was trying to do them with the attitude that she wasn't "ahead" of me, nor was I "behind". It's just different!

The next week, I resolved to make a big dent in the Property Control report because we had several laptops "move" over the summer, we acquired lots of new equipment, added to our one-to-one status,  and our online accounting system had to be updated. I sat for 4 hours one day just doing that. Now, this isn't due until mid-October, but I wanted to tackle most of it now, so I don't have to close once I actually do open for the students. And more than that, I needed the peace of mind. So, 2 weeks down and not "open" for students yet, but I was still doing my job...in addition to everything from the second paragraph. Yet that evil Twitter reminded me even more about my fellow MS who were open, and even checking out to Kindergarten! What? I don't get to that until maybe November !!!! Double Curse you, Twitter!

I thought this was supposed to be my "Game Changer" year! I even got to hear author Donalyn Miller speak about that this summer! What happened? Am I not a Game Changer? Can I still get in the Game? Are their different rules for different MS? Of course not, relax Sandy. You're fine, meeting student and staff needs, respecting what your Administration wants you to do to contribute to the school. Brightening the culture. Just coming in the first day with a fresh attitude and welcome to your students (even if it was just car line and lunch duty) can make you a Game Changer! Wherever you are with students and teachers you can preach the Game Changer message of book access for all kids. Your attention to their needs and interests shows your engagement with them, which will translate to their engagement once the library visits start. Wherever students are is an opportunity for me to talk books! Don't disparage not having the formal opening yet...look for those opportunities throughout the day!

So this past week, Week 3, I started Orientations and saw most of our 3-5 grades until Hurricane Dorian prep took precedence on Friday. I had a fun Scavenger Hunt and checked out books! Happy Sandy! Game Changer! Life is beautiful! Yet, I could easily have stayed closed another week to REALLY catch up! I'm blessed to have teachers who know that the classroom procedures and routines are important to teach, so they aren't in a big hurry to have them come for books. And they have good classroom libraries. But there's nothing like the book access I could give them! Happily opening for the year erased the Twitter shame I'd felt. But the experience did remind me that: a. This happens every year, b. Everyone is happy after the first month, c. No one remembers when I opened, d. I could probably not even do Orientations and there wouldn't be much difference in library behavior....just start my usual open access! (but that's another posting: Two types of Media Specialists: those who do Orientations and those who don't...and it probably doesn't matter!)

So I just want to encourage you in whatever state you're in today, relax and enjoy your job, no matter where you are in your "beginning of the year" procedures. What we do is hard work. Some schools are harder than others. But you're in a profession that's vital to your school and your children. You chose this! Embrace the "stuff" that goes with it. Remember the quality time with the children is near. It's all good. If your Administration is happy, that's a good start. They might need their own copy of "Game Changer", but let them get past the initial challenges of a new year before you share it! Don't compare yourself to another MS, unless it's to call you up higher, maybe out of a funk or rut you're in. But remember that we're all different! Not more or less, just different. And that's why I love our profession as Media Specialists!

Hope your year is off to a great start! Now more than ever, stay grounded!